No More Surprises

I came across this essay by Kevin Guilfoile in Heather Armstrong's book Things I Learned About My Dad, in which Kevin lists the ten things he's learned about fatherhood. My favorite on his list? #2: Don't Ask the Doctor for the Sex of Your Baby.

It sounds a bit antiquated, and frankly, I was even SHOCKED to see it in print by someone else- a father, to boot! He goes on to say that there's really nothing left to say on birth announcements once the sex is known and the mystery is gone.

It brings back memories when I was preggers with Josh and we decided to keep the sex of the baby a mystery. OH MY GOD! You'd think I was working some covert CIA mission to exploit koala bears. I didn't realize keeping the surprise was so WEIRD, I mean, how could you NOT KNOW WHAT YOU'RE HAVING?? What was I thinking? I can't tell you how many smirks I got when people asked what I was having and I'd politely answer "I don't know, it's a surprise!" And then I'd get Really? But how do you know what to buy? Huh? I think they make onesies in white (I don't think either boy or girl would object to that) and I like neutrals anyway so it's not like I was just dying to fill a room with pink or blue stuff.

Our world today is littered with predictability; any surprises that come up are not usually good ones (except for maybe the occasional "stripper in a cake" routine at a 30th birthday party)... how boring. Is that as good as it gets? Some T & A popping out of a cake? That's it? I was determined to make a GOOD surprise for myself.

I saw this line somewhere and it's totally true: It's the miracle of life for a reason, not: on this day a girl (or boy) will come into my life. There's something sacred about the birth of a child and who are we to ruin Mother Nature's surprise to us. It's like finding out your husband planned this huge surprise to take you to see Britney Spears on your anniversary and he even got a babysitter! OK, yes, having a baby IS better than seeing Britney shake her thing, but getting a babysitter is just the cherry on the cake! Go Mike! The point is, that when I told Mike that I knew what his surprise was, I might as well have crushed his dreams with my bare, muscular hands (eww, what a visual). I don't know too many people who like having their surprises found out before it's time, why would you do it to Mother Nature?

I liked not knowing that on ___ day in October I was going to have a ___. There was mystical and thrilling feeling about it accompanying the Braxton-Hicks. Plus, it gave my husband an important task during delivery:

40 weeks of discomfort and swelling... $12,486

30 hours of slow, intense labor... $5 for narcotics and a glass of wine

Having your husband tell you the sex of your baby with tears in his eyes... Priceless.